Abuse Checklist
KNOW THE FACTS, KNOW THE RESOURCES, TAKE ACTION
If you are the subject of behaviors listed below on more than one occasion during your relationship, then you are a victim.
Abusive acts include:
slapping - shaking - punching - beating - biting - pulling hair - pushing - pinching - kicking - stabbing - tickling excessively - throwing objects - driving recklessly - denying food, sleep or medical care - using sexual names to put you down - forcing unwanted sexual acts.
You are abused if you have been:
- accused unjustly of flirting or going out with another
- threatened
- humiliated in public
- called ugly names
- been isolated from your family and friends
- locked out of the house
- abandoned in dangerous places
- manipulated with lies
- had your property or pets destroyed
- been continually criticized or had your feelings continually ignored
Even if only one or two incidents of physical abuse have occurred, there is cause for concern. Studies show that if your partner abuses you on just two occasions, he is likely to continue to abuse you.
If you are unclear on whether you are abused, take the following quiz.
If you answer yes to just half of the following, you are a victim of abuse.
Yes No
___ ___ I am afraid of my partner.
___ ___ I cannot express my feelings or opinions without being afraid of the reaction.
___ ___ I have to ask permission from my partner to see my family or friends.
___ ___ I have to ask permission to spend money or buy something for myself.
___ ___ I constantly try to make things "just right" to please my partner.
___ ___ I try and try to please my partner, just to get criticized again.
___ ___ I sometimes feel that my partner is two people (Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde).
___ ___ My partner seems to see our relationship in a whole different way than I see it. I am confused about the relationship.
___ ___ I am beginning to believe all the terrible things my partner says about me. I'm not sure what is real anymore. Maybe I am going crazy.
Adapted from INTO THE LIGHT: A GUIDE FOR BATTERED WOMEN, by Leslie A. Cantrell